Identity Crisis

Some people, a lot of people, are in desperate need of an identity makeover. I thought the common need to put on a face was bad in high school, but I think it only gets worse. Then it goes away completely. In spite of the highly individualistic culture we find ourselves in, here in America, most Americans strive to up their self-perceived appraisal value by associating themselves as part of a larger whole, or by living as caricatures of socially accepted "types."

It's all crap. Just be yourself. You may be pretty shallow, but it's not until you commit to a lifetime of role-playing or conforming that you truly become empty. And there are a lot of empty people. If you were made unique - BE unique. And we were all made unique. But the truth is, if you refuse to really be yourself, you will lose yourself. You'll be like those old films - kept in a closet so long, the celluloid disintegrates into nothing and the film is gone forever.

There's a difference between manufacturing your identity and just being really into something and feeling pride toward it. Here's a short list of some examples and you can decide in which camp each belongs.

- Aggies. I'll try not to wave my opinion around too much on these, but give me a break. It's where you went to school, not a place where the gods forged your soul and made you the chosen people. Get over it - move on. No one is impressed that you're an Aggie. Here's a scene that will never happen. Ever...
Manager announcing a new employee at the office: "Everyone, this is Bill. Bill was with IBM for 2 years and, before that, graduated from A&M."
Aggies in the crowd: (various) "Woop! Woop! Woop! Woop! Woop! Woop! Woop! Woop!"
Person in crowd: (reacting to Aggies) "Man - that's really cool!"

The most pathetic a person can get...
(listening to a prayer request)
"And Pray for Susan, who just found out she has terminal brain cancer. She is a junior at A&M."
(from the crowd)"woop."

- Alum from any other college. It's a school. You went there. So what. If you're older than 24 and college is still the highlight of your life - it's because you don't have a life yet. Get one. I'm going to start mentioning my elementary school all the time and showing up to as many PE classes as I can, to catch the games. I'm going to make the school song the ring tone for my cell phone. I'm going to give people from other elementary schools crap for not going to my school.

- Office cool guy. If you think this describes you, then it surely doesn't. If you're guilty of any of the following, you're not the cool guy, you're the office loser:
Saying - "It's almost beer o'clock!" (or "It's beer:30!")
Over 40, flirting with the girls fresh out of college. You're a loser and a perv. If the girl likes it, she's a loser.
Always trashing your wife, announcing how much you hate having to go home to your family. Some psycho should use you to add to his human spine and brain collection.
Bragging that you're an alcoholic.
Cussing all the time, no matter who's around, even ladies.

- Mr. tattoo. If you think tattoos make you look cool, consider the guys who gave you the tattoo. You aren't original if your tattoo is...
Chinese script, on your ankle, a fish, a cross, a sun, on the lower part of your back, or a combination of any of these


Sorry if this has been a little scattered. I've been trying to finish it for 2 days, but hardly ever got a chance. Nevertheless, comments are appreciated as always. Not commenting is like not tipping your waiter.