Germ Warfare. Personal Space. Slow Motion.
- If you cough, cover your mouth. But you defeat the purpose if you then touch everything with your snotted hand.
- Don't smack when you eat or chew gum. This is something I learned at 5, how can so many people still be clueless to this?? There are times, at a restaurant, at work, at a movie, when I feel like I'm the only one around who isn't a Viking. It looks nasty, it sounds nasty. Some people I know smack so loud even Helen Keller would get pissed.
- If you yawn, go against the natural urge and keep your mouth shut. No one wants a hot gust of your gut.
- More than two sniffs means get a Kleenex.
- If you're one of those people who loudly clears your throat every now and then, know that the people around you are mad at you.
- If you can't speak English, you should be restricted to answering customer service calls from your native country. I am very polite on the phone, but if I get one more customer service rep who only speaks, I mean slurs, broken English, I'm going to tell them someone's in my house, trying to kill me and this is the only number I could call because my phone is broken.
"He left! He said I'm not who he wanted. He wants someone named Patel."
"But Patel is ME!!"
- I also have a hard time when support is talking to me on the phone, stepping me through something on the computer or with my cable at home and they go 1mph. I start saying my "okay, okay"s faster and faster to give them the message that I'm not that stupid or slow. It's like running underwater.
- If you're walking down a hall or lane, pick a side. Since we're in America, go with the right side. When you walk in the middle, I'm forced to be the sucker stuck behind you or the jerk squeezing past you.
- Don't talk about yourself like you're some cool movie character. No one should ever say, "I'm crazy, but not that crazy!" or "That's a little wild - even for me!". Until there's a movie about you, keep the catch phrases to yourself. And there's never going to be a movie about you, stupid.
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1 comment:
Man, I am sorry for you. People in your office or in Dallas just suck and have really bad habits.
Sneezing or coughing should be covered, but researchers now say that it is best to cough into your elbow. That way you don't spread germs. Think about it, and it is true. How often do you shake elbows? Also, if you salute instead of shake hands, no germs get spread (Paul Harvey's idea).
Yawning is a nasty feature of humans and I agree that you should either cover your mouth or close it. I really don't care how many cavities you have or to see the scar from when you had your tonsils removed.
Companies that have people in the customer service department that can speak less english than my dog piss me off. I hate that and it is a growing trend. I usually hang up or ask to speak to their supervisor and explain that it would be appreciated by the majority of us if they would employ more people that can actually speak english.
In all fairness to support people, they have to go slow because most people are stupid and don't listen. I run into the same problem you do when I HAVE to call in. I avoid it at all cost and if I can't figure it out, usually I call for a tech to come out and do a visual inspection. 99% of the time I tell them what the problem is, and I am correct.
Pick a side. This is true for everything in life. No one likes a person who stays in the middle and never commits to either side. This is true from walking to every aspect of life.
I guess I better shut up now.
AB
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