Imponderables 1

I think of these all the time, but wait for a bunch to pile up in my head, and then typically forget all of them. So, I'm going to post them as they come to me.

Imponderable: Childrens Books

I don't understand people who publish childrens books. They must not have kids. At what point did the standard layout for childrens books be to put as few words on a page as possible?? Who is this aimed at helping? I doubt a kid who is old enough to read would be interested in the books I'm talking about, so the word count per page can't be to help them read. And it isn't because there is so much illustration on each page - most of the pages have a picture of a duck or owl just sitting there. So why are there so few words on a page? Even Max Lucado uses longer sentences that the ones in childrens books.

If the writers/publishers of these books had kids, they would know the level of coordination required to hold a kid with one arm, hold a bottle or something with one arm, hold the book with one arm, pick up the thrown bottle/sippy cup/pacifier/blanket/toy with one arm, and turn the pages with one arm. Of course, this is indeed possible for a mommy or daddy, but it isn't easy. It is serious insult to injury when we're forced to turn the page every 2 seconds because there are only 4 words on a page! Plus, every time I turn the page, I say "Let's turn the page." I'm genuinely afraid that someday Sam will reach a boiling point and I'll have to show up to a crime scene where several dead bodies lay and written in blood on the walls is: Let's Turn The Page!

Billy looked outside
let's turn the page
and saw a birdie
let's turn the page
the birdie had red feathers
let's turn the page
and a yellow beak
let's turn the page...


I think I'm going to transcribe all of Sam's books into PowerPoint. Then, I'll be able to swap "Let's turn the page" with "Next slide, please."